This thought-provoking piece, written by my friend Rick Wilcox, appeared originally on his Literary Life blog. I am reprinting it with his permission, and I hope you'll head over there and read other posts he has written. I find them both intellectually and spiritually nourishing. Rick is a greatly appreciated Heartspoken Connection Messenger.*
Let all guests who arrive be received as Christ, because He will say: “I was a stranger and you took Me in.” And let due honor be shown to all, especially to those “of the household of the faith” and to wayfarers. When, therefore, a guest is announced, let him be met by the superior and the brethren with every mark of charity.…In the greeting let all humility be shown to the guests, whether coming or going; with the head bowed down or the whole body prostrate on the ground, let Christ be adored in them as He is also received.
St. Benedict, from The Rule
Oh God, It's My Brother!
We entertain a lot of guests during the holidays, and let’s admit it – some are more challenging than others. There’s an old saying that in the end you end up picking your own family because often your friends are closer than brothers. Extended families can go all year without much communication, but when the holidays come around, they are often thrust back together, and just the thought of that can be a big source of stress.
It’s ironic and sad that kindness to strangers is often easier than talking to a loved one without being sarcastic. Our minds are nasty little catalogs of all the ways we have been hurt and offended, and we separate ourselves emotionally out of bitterness and pain. In this sense, our families can become strangers to us. The hidden opportunity (beyond possible or impossible reconciliation) is for personal growth.
We become more Christ-like when we serve the image of God who is standing before us – even if He is disguised as your relative.
Rick Wilcox
Hebrews 13: 1-2
Let mutual love continue. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers,
for by doing that some have entertained angels without knowing it.
Rick Wilcox is a businessman, theologian and literature wonk. Founder and moderator of Literary Life, a website dedicated to the illumination of truth through reading the classics, Wilcox is an ordained minister with a heart for all of God's children.
* A Heartspoken Connection Messenger is someone who helps point the way to strengthening the essential connections in our lives: with God, with self, with others, and with nature.
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I guess we all have “that one”. Dealing with that person would be a lot easier if they, too, felt some responsibility for their actions/attitudes, wouldn’t it?! Maybe they are in our lives to teach us humility, tolerance, control of our emotions. But taking that advice is definitely easier said than done.
Oh, yes indeed, Esther! The bottom line, though, is we can never control how the other person acts or reacts…we can only try to control ourselves. And it is SO much easier said than done. But we can’t begin until we’re aware, so I hope this article is a step towards that awareness.
Thank you dear one. I’m honored to be back on your wonderful site.
Rick, you are always so gracious about letting me share your beautiful content. It is a privilege to support you in sharing your faith and bringing Christ’s light into the darkness.
I’ve had awkward Christmas celebrations…having to spend time with yucky family members. I won’t say who! I was always gracious, even when I didn’t want to be, just to keep the peace. Now, I am one of those fortunate people who live in outer Mongolia (translation – North Dakota), and nobody wants to visit here in December. So I get my son, his lovely wife, and my two grandchildren for the holidays. Bliss! No awkward. No jerks. Just fun. And I have to say that Rick’s blog is awesome – he takes the scriptures and compares them to real life situations…awesome blog.
His blog really is awesome, isn’t it, Karen? So many well-intentioned Christian writers serve up pie in the sky. Rick manages to take us where the rubber meets the road and help us understand what God’s Word means to us today.
I’m a big believer in boundaries when it comes to family functions. The line is thicker with some than others. But enforcing a boundary surely makes for a more enjoyable gathering.
What a fantastic observation, Denise: “The line is thicker with some than others.” So, so true!
I always appreciate your comments and your support.