It’s “Connect with God” Week here at Heartspoken.

The third week of each month this year will focus on ways to strengthen your connection with God. Please don’t get hung up if “God” is not your preferred word for your Higher Power. I will use “God,” but you may be more comfortable with one of the many terms used in different faiths. I believe Truth (with a capital T) transcends the borders we impose, and I beg you to open your heart and mind to Truth, whatever its source.

The seasons of nature are often reflected in the seasons of our lives and the seasons of our soul. All the spiritual giants I’ve known, personally or by reading about them, have had periods in their spiritual lives during which they felt very distant from any relationship with God. These are often called dry spells or desert times, and they can be accompanied by feelings of abandonment, despair, and confusion.

It’s not just you.

Inspirational Christian author Catherine Marshall wrote a moving account of her spiritual struggle in Beyond Ourselves. Moses, Elijah, Jesus and Paul all had their own desert periods too. If you practice any kind of a spiritual tradition, you know the rare “mountaintop” experience is offset by periods of spiritual winter in which our hearts can feel frozen and hard. We wonder where God is and why we no longer feel his love.

I have had these times myself. Some of the most dangerous (in terms of damaging my faith) have not been so much feeling abandoned as feeling indifferent. The chinks in my faith armor have been chipped away to reveal holes where doubt and fear could seep in. Always, always, I have found my way back to God (or have allowed myself to be re-found by God) and rejoiced in the reunion, but it’s not a comfortable place to be.

Perspective and preparation are critical.

If you are experiencing spiritual winter now, remember this is a natural cycle and will not last forever. Don’t despair and don’t give up on yourself or God!

Even if you’re not experiencing it now, prepare yourself. M. Scott Peck, in The Road Less Traveled, described the person who walks into the ocean without thought and is unexpectedly knocked over by a wave, emerging scraped and bruised from the underwater tumble. The savvy swimmer, however, anticipates the wave and dives straight into it, passing smoothly under it and up on the other side. When we expect the spiritual winters, they can feel less devastating than they might otherwise.

Like the devoted gardener who stays busy in the winter making preparations for the spring, we must tend our spiritual winters as best we can. I’ve researched some ways to warm yourself during these times. Like the bulb hibernating in the dark, cold earth, or the maple tree whose sap is stored in the trunk and roots during the winter, you’ll stay nurtured and ready for spring when the sun yields more heat and the sap starts to rise.

Survival tactics during a spiritual winter

• Lean into it instead of resisting it. In Beyond Ourselves, Catherine Marshall tells of months during the illness of a beloved grandchild when she felt totally abandoned by God. She ranted and cried in her prayers until she was exhausted. Finally, unable to maintain any semblance of control over the situation, she prayed what she called the Prayer of Relinquishment in which she abandoned herself to God’s eternal care and love, giving up all control over the outcome. Being the control freaks many of us are (okay, I’ll speak for myself), this is not easy, but it often gets ourselves out of the way so God can work.

Eckhart Tolle, German-born counselor and spiritual teacher, reminds us, “Always say ‘yes’ to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is? …Surrender to what is. Say ‘yes’ to life — and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you.”

• Consider this might be a time of preparation. Moses, Elijah, Jesus, and Paul all went through a desert time, which turned out to be a proving ground of strength and fine-tuning. They emerged from their desert experiences with a burst of spiritual energy and accomplishment. “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed” (1 Peter 1: 6-7).

• Take care of yourself physically. When I experience feelings of depression or low spiritual energy, I sometimes realize I’ve been burning the candle at both ends. It’s not a spiritual winter; I’m simply exhausted. Get rest. Eat a healthy diet. Seek balance in your life.

• Confide in a trusted friend. “Shared joy is double joy and shared sorrow is half-sorrow” (Swedish Proverb). Sometimes it simply helps to let things out, especially when the other person might be able to encourage you to “hang in there” and not despair.

• Check in with your conscience. If you have been living out of synch with your core values, you could feel a distance from God. This is self-imposed. Confess. Do what you can to make it right. Ask God to reveal to you what you need to do or let go. God loves you and wants nothing more than for you to be enfolded in his everlasting arms.

• Work on your mindset. Instead of thinking God is absent, believe God is currently not visible. Remember the sun is still shining above the rain clouds, even when you can’t see it.

• Count your blessings. Scripture reminds us to give thanks in all things (not for all things but in all things). There is something powerful about the exercise of practicing gratitude that lifts the spirit and wards off despair.

• Be patient and resolve to wait on God. “…those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint” (Isaiah 40:31).

• Stay alert for signs of love and comfort from God. The Israelites thought God had abandoned them in the desert, yet there was a pillar of fire by night, a pillar of cloud by day, and manna every day. How dense could they be? Where did they think these miracles came from? Sometimes we feel so sorry for ourselves we fail to notice God’s love, often poured through the actions of others.

• Nourish your soul…even if you don’t feel like it. Don’t give up on your spiritual practices. Pray, even if your prayers feel empty. And yes, it’s okay to be honest with God if you’re angry, bereft, or frustrated. As David wrote in Psalm 38, verse 9: “All my longings lie open before you, oh Lord; my sighing is not hidden from you.”

Read devotional literature, even if you’re not in the mood. Hannah Whitall Smith, in her classic The Christian’s Secret of a Happy Life, reminded readers we have God’s word through Scripture to give us guidance. It might take longer to get the message if you’re skipping your Bible reading and holding out for a voice from a burning bush.

• Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. When you’re in the midst of a spiritual winter, it can seem as though God is working in everyone’s life but yours. This is simply a delusion.

• Be kind to yourself, especially if you’re going through a life change or hard time. Most of us are quick to berate ourselves for things out of our control. Accept help from others if it’s offered.

Hymn writer Natalie Allyn Wakeley Sleeth (1930-1992) must have known the pain of a spiritual winter when she wrote Hymn of Praise (Copyright Hope Publishing Company):

Below are some resources and further scripture readings to help someone cope when they’re going through a spiritual winter. What books, practices, or resources have helped you strengthen your connection with God when you’ve felt disconnected? Please share in the comments below or join the conversation at Heartspoken’s Facebook Page.

Resources

Bible Gateway website

Bible Verses of Encouragement from Bible-Knowledge.com: 79 selected verses all telling you to never give up, to keep pressing on, and to fully rely on the Lord and his guidance to get you through the trial and into your next level of service with him.

Cybernation.com Quotation Center website

Fulwiler, Jennifer. “9 Tips for Spiritual Dry Spells.” A blog post from Conversion diary website, July, 2009.

Glanville, Dr. Gary R. “Spiritual Dryness.” A sermon from the website of Romeo United Methodist Church, Romeo, Michigan, January, 2009.

Loughman, Peter. “Hard Times – Better than Evian Water.”  A sermon from SermonCentral.com, April, 2008.

Tada, Joni Eareckson. “Let Down Your Net: Spiritual Refreshment for Pastors.” A sermon from SermonCentral.com, 2007.

Photo credit: “Alone” by Patrice Dufour, Vancouver, Canada, via StockXchng.

As a life-long Episcopalian, I recognize today, January 6, as The Feast of Epiphany, the end of the twelve days of Christmas and  a celebration of the revelation of God to mankind in human form, in the person of Jesus Christ. It coincides with the Jewish Feast of Lights and shares some of its symbolism.

The lovely manger scene pictured above was given to my husband by his Aunt Mamie over sixty years ago. Every year, it holds a prominent place in our “Christmas Room,” where it represents the core meaning of our Christmas celebration – the birth of the Christ Child on Earth and in our hearts.

It is now time to put the manger away. I treasure the ritual. As I wrap each figure lovingly to put it away until next year, I take the opportunity to reflect on the role each of them played in the story: Mary, Joseph, the shepherds, the Wise Men…and yes, even the animals. I reflect, too, on the double miracle of Christ’s birth and the millions of faithful, practicing Christians over two thousand years later, all because of a single man’s ministry thought to have spanned little more than three years.

The baby Jesus is the last figure to be wrapped. As I lay Him gently in the box, I say a prayer that the light of His life and love will always burn brightly in my heart, my thoughts, my words, and my actions. So simple, yet so profound…

In a very real sense, rituals and traditions are special—even holy—connections with those touchstones of our heritage and our faith, whatever that heritage and faith may be.

What rituals and traditions are meaningful to you at this time of year? I’d love to hear them in the Comments section below, or join the conversation at Heartspoken’s Facebook Page.

Photo credit: John A. Cottrell, Jr., M.D.

Today I was happily  reminded that some things have the power to connect us across boundaries of culture, race, age, and geographical distance.

The famous ”Hallelujah Chorus” from  Messiah, by George Frideric Handel , has been performed thousands of times. The English-language oratorio was composed in 1741 and first performed in Dublin in 1742, with a premiere in London the following year. I had to share this delightful video (sent to me by my friend, Jo Stickley) from the small Yupiq Eskimo Village of Quinhagak, Alaska. It is said to have been a school computer project intended for the other Yupiq villages in the area. Much to the villagers’ shock, over three quarters of a million people have viewed it. The inspiring waves of glorious praise, the depth of the spiritual message, and the innocence and whimsical behavior of the Yupiq children will make you smile and fill your heart. No wonder music is known as the universal language. Enjoy!

Upper Photo credit: Sondra P via iStockPhoto.com

Introducing Connection Messenger Sherry Woodcock, author, blogger, and spiritual teacher. This is an excerpt from her new book, Daily Spiritual Tools.

Sometimes I find myself too busy. It’s a tendency I learned in childhood, taking on too much responsibility for things to try to keep my world safe. I’m not complaining; I’m definitely not the only person in the world who believes at times that she can hold it up single-handedly. That particular part of my personality has provided me with a good deal of compassion and a desire to make things better in my own small way. I am grateful for the opportunity to learn what I learn from it, and I continue looking for balance in my life.

Last night I came home from work feeling stressed and really looking forward to my meditation time. I was aware that I needed to stop for a while, but more than that, I also felt that I needed some help with all of it. I was too burdened, in that moment, to even know what kind of help I was seeking. I was eager to just sit and rest, and let the answers come.

As I closed my eyes and grounded my body, the voice of God within me reminded me clearly to keep it simple and come as a child. I felt instantly eased as my body caught up with the fact that I could be very gentle in my attention to myself, because there was nothing else to be concerned about. As I sat in communication with the God of my heart, I was able to be the center of my own universe, knowing that all existed for my good, much like a child involved in some kind of wonderful, creative play. In my simple meditation, I watched as my own electric blue life force energy coursed through my body, aware at the same time of Father/Mother God standing over my shoulder, watching over me, shielding me, and orchestrating everything for good.

I know myself as a child of God, made in her image, creator without limit of my own sacred life. But I don’t think I’d ever perceived myself as God’s child, beloved, precious and safe, seeing myself as God does, without the need to do anything to earn my place here. I sometimes think that all human worry stems from the very common but flawed thinking that if we could just fulfill some role a little better we just might be allowed to stay.

There’s a part in Neale Walsch’s Conversations With God in which God says, “You can’t hear my truth until you stop telling me yours.” I believe that’s what happened last night in my meditation. When I finally released my own agenda, stopped trying to control the outcome of everything in my thinking, and just sat quietly waiting for the truth I sought, the voice of my knowing reminded me that we are, all of us, held in the benevolent hands of infinite good. I know in my head that I am safe and that divine intelligence is at work, but I really appreciate those times when I know it in my heart and my body as well. It’s balm for the soul of the scared child that exists as a part of me, and for the fairly capable grown-up who sometimes needs a very solid reminder that she, and the rest of this planet, are safe in the perfect design of ongoing creation.

May this tool be a blessing. . .

Sherry

[NOTE FROM ELIZABETH: Many are familiar with the verse from Matthew 18:3: "And he [Jesus] said, ‘I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.’” What is it about becoming like children that seems to resonate across so many different cultures and religious orientations? Share your thoughts below or join the conversation on our Heartspoken Facebook Page.]

Sherry Woodcock

Sherry Woodcock is a spiritual teacher, mother, grandmother, wife and author of Daily Spiritual Tools, the blog and the book (available in both paperback and e-book/Kindle formats).  Sherry is on a life-long journey to find God in daily life.  “If we are able to know God within ourselves, and as ourselves, in the midst of the day-to-day events of our lives, work, parenting, paying bills, doing our best and our not-so-best, we help to elevate others and our world.”  

This was one of a series of articles I wrote for the parish newsletter of my Episcopal church in Shenandoah County, VA, as part of our annual “Joyful Giving” campaign. Our leadership group is called the Vestry, and the regional organization of the church to which we belong is called The Diocese.

I share it here because I feel so strongly that regardless of which church we attend…or whether we attend church at all…our Connection with God is directly related to our willingness to give back from the abundance with which we’ve been blessed…not from obligation but from a natural outpouring of gratitude and joy.

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Forget about the church budget!

Forget about the church budget when you think about your personal Joyful Giving.

I hope our church Treasurers (past and present) will forgive me this rather flippant statement. I appreciate that the Vestry is required to be a good steward of monies it receives from various sources, and fiscal responsibility must go hand-in-hand with faithfulness.

When it comes to deciding how much I give back to God in the form of an annual church pledge, however, a decision based on church need drives me towards obligatory giving rather than joyful giving…towards a mentality of scarcity rather than one of abundance.

After all, the Church is in the love-spreading, life-empowering, relationship-building, Christ-sharing business. The church should not be in the fund-raising business. Yet far too often, stewardship campaigns and programs are little more than glorified fundraisers with an added layer of guilt applied. Banish that mindset!

What does God care about?

I doubt if God cares whether we get enough pledges from our parishioners to pay our electric and fuel bills. But I believe He deeply cherishes what goes on within the walls of our churches and parish halls:

• The joyful and enriching opportunity we offer weekly to worship God
• The availability of our sanctuaries for silent prayer and contemplation
• The nourishing and raising up of young people who are learning about the Bible and faith and how to love others
• The fellowship we exhibit to visitors
• The fellowship we exhibit to each other that may be, for some, the social high point of their week
• The serving of food to members of our neighborhood and community
• The outreach activities and fundraisers that touch the lives of those less fortunate
• The community functions to which we lend the use of our facilities.

Like ripples from a pebble thrown into a pool of calm water, love, generosity and caring within our churches move out far beyond their walls. They are manifested in the support we give each other in the various crises of our lives: illness, death, tragedy, loneliness, suffering. Through the remarkable leverage of our churches’ gifts to the Diocese, these ripples meet needs greater and farther than we could ever do on our own.

The holy connection of joyful giving

As I think of my giving to the church as a way to connect with God and his eternal purposes, I begin to glimpse the miracle that occurred with the loaves and fishes when Jesus fed the crowds of hungry people. What joy to be able to be a part of this…joyful giving, indeed!

How do you decide what to give back to your church or to charitable work in the world? Do you find it difficult to accomplish the scriptural tithe (10%)? Do you give with joy or with a sense of obligation? How can we change our attitude about money and giving? Please comment below or join the conversation at Heartspoken’s Facebook Page. 

Carman Goodrich

Can it really be ten years since the terrible attacks on American soil that took place on September 11, 2001? We all remember exactly where we were and what we were doing when we first heard about it, and that whole day was surreal. For thousands, the nightmare has not ended because of everything from physical and mental health issues to the economic impact from loss of loved ones and personal property. My heart aches for each of these people, and I pray they find help and solace in the midst of their pain.

I do not believe in dwelling on tragedy, but surely it is appropriate to learn lessons and reflect on the outpouring of courage and love that took place at the time and that continues. I want to share a beautiful piece entitled “On My Honor,” written by my friend Anne Goodrich (@AnneGogh) about her son — 11 years old that fateful September day in 2001 — and his poignant response to what he was witnessing on television. It’s not long, and well worth your time: http://bit.ly/qVFhZy.

The words “Lest we forget…”  of Rudyard Kipling’s famous poem/hymn “Recessional” are haunting me as I think about 9/11. It warns of the perils of hubris and holds lessons for us as individuals and as a country. I share it here:

RECESSIONAL by Rudyard Kipling

God of our fathers, known of old—
Lord of our far-flung battle line—
Beneath whose awful hand we hold
Dominion over palm and pine—
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget—lest we forget!

The tumult and the shouting dies—
The Captains and the Kings depart—
Still stands Thine ancient sacrifice,
An humble and a contrite heart.
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget—lest we forget!

Far-called our navies melt away—
On dune and headland sinks the fire—
Lo, all our pomp of yesterday
Is one with Nineveh and Tyre!
Judge of the Nations, spare us yet,
Lest we forget—lest we forget!

If, drunk with sight of power, we loose
Wild tongues that have not Thee in awe—
Such boastings as the Gentiles use,
Or lesser breeds without the Law—
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget—lest we forget!

For heathen heart that puts her trust
In reeking tube and iron shard—
All valiant dust that builds on dust,
And guarding calls not Thee to guard.
For frantic boast and foolish word,
Thy Mercy on Thy People, Lord!
Amen.

What lessons have you learned from 9/11? Has it made you want to strengthen those connections in your life most precious to you? Has it made you more aware of the work of police and firefighters and medical professionals who work every day to keep us safe? Has it made you appreciate every moment you have with your loved ones? I hope so.

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Additional 9/11 Reflections: “Connection Lessons from Sept. 11“

Photo by John A. Cottrell, Jr., M.D.

You have to pick up the phone!

Whatever your name for a higher power — God, Source, Spirit, Universe — that power cannot connect with you if you don’t pick up the phone! But what on earth does “picking up the phone” actually look like in the development of our spiritual life?

The answer is far beyond the scope of a blog post…books and papers have been written about prayer by theologians far more advanced spiritually than I am…but I’ve recently come across a very helpful article called “Ten Ways to Pray” put out by Forward Movement Publications, an agency of the Episcopal Church devoted to “creating compelling content for Christian living.” Since the introduction says to “feel free to share this with friends, family, or anyone you feel could benefit by its content,” I am pleased to do so. Please note the authors are not trying to say these are the only ways to pray, but rather that these are ways they know to be useful to many people.

The importance of talking to God — and that’s my definition of prayer — is the same as the importance of talking to anyone whom you love, care about, or want to get to know better. It enriches life, clarifies understanding, increases empathy, and enables a conduit for give-and-take that is simply not possible when the connection is broken. If you want to connect with your higher power, you have to make yourself available, just as you do in any meaningful relationship.

Ten Ways to Pray

Each of these ten ways to pray is described and discussed in the article:

1. Praying with Scripture
2. The Daily Office (found in The Book of Common Prayer)
3. The Rosary
4. Journaling
5. Centering Prayer
6. Body Prayer
7. Singing
8. Praying with icons
9. The Jesus Prayer
10. Prayer groups and prayer partners

I’ve used several of these ways, and I intend to try others. I’m experimenting right now with Journaling Prayer and finding it fascinating and helpful. I’ll write more about that later.

There’s no one right way to pray!

Please grasp this message. It’s easy to get hung up on worrying about whether you’re “doing it right” instead of just doing it! And don’t be afraid to change the way you pray as your own spiritual life develops and as you mature. Remember that “the purpose of prayer is to open ourselves to God so that God may bring us and the world into harmony with his purposes.”

Be honest when you talk to God

Another misconception is that we can’t be angry or frustrated or anything but pious when we talk to God. Hogwash! The Psalms are loaded with prayers to God that are nothing short of rants and ravings. They include feelings of rage, jealousy, hurt, anger, desire for revenge, and so much more. These are a rich source of real prayers by real people, and when you can’t find your own words, just borrow the words of others. God doesn’t care, as long as you’re being real and honest. God can handle anything we dish out.

Please share in the comments below your own thoughts about prayer and ways to pray, books, blogs, or speakers that have been meaningful to you.

Additional Prayer Resources

Photo credit: “Its for you!” by Vicki S., U.K., Great Britain via Stock.xchng

My husband and I  have just experienced an incredible drive up the coast of California between Los Angeles and San Francisco, as well as visits to Point Reyes National Seashore north of San Francisco and Muir Woods. We enjoyed breathtaking vistas of rugged coastline and walked a trail gazing up at immense redwood trees. The experiences have been thrilling and even spiritual. Two songs kept coming to mind: “This Land is Your Land” and “How Great Thou Art.” This trip was the perfect backdrop for reflecting this July Fourth on the wonderful country I call home.

Jerry Large

A piece in today’s paper by Seattle Times staff columnist Jerry Large called “Remember What We Should Be Celebrating” resonated with me.

People will casually say this is a country built on a set of ideals rather than a nation bound by a shared ethnicity, race or religion. But what that means is that we can’t just celebrate an event that took place in 1776; we have to work constantly to keep what began then alive.

Never in our country’s history has the fragility of connection between its citizens been challenged so much, as fear and ignorance give rise to prejudice and misunderstanding. As Mr. Large said, “We still have descendants of immigrants who despise new immigrants,” and that’s such a contradiction with the principles on which our country was founded. Hard times, such as our current economic situation, can bring out the worst — or the best — in us, and diversity can challenge our feelings of connection.

As I reflect on America’s amazing flexibility and resilience, and on the times such as the Civil War when we almost tore ourselves apart, I say a fervent prayer for this country and its potential for a future of opportunity and prosperity for all. As Jerry Large ends his column,

We ought to look down the road and ask what kind of country we want to leave to our grandchildren. Enlightened or ignorant, we all get to choose.

He is so right.

What choices can you make today to help ensure America’s future?

Photo credit: “Colors” by Billy Alexander (via http://www.sxc.hu), Charlotte, NC, http://www.dreamstime.com/Billyruth03_portfolio_pg1

I’m participating with a wonderful group of women from around the world in a “Play in May” program (coordinated by our Heartspoken Connection Messenger Cyndi Briggs of The Sophia Project), and we’re exploring ways to increase playfulness in our lives. Sandy Phocas (www.co-creativeevolution.com) shared this amazing four minute video. Watch it, think about it, and LIVE IT!

Here’s to your happiness!

Please share in a comment what makes YOU happy…

My good friend, Cindy Hunter sent me a copy of Russel Kelfer’s poem “Wait” this week, not realizing how perfect the timing was for me to be reminded of this important spiritual message. My journal is filled with the phrase, “Oh, for a burning bush…”  In this age of instant information from a search engine –and instant gratification–we’ve come to expect answers…fast answers. God’s timing is often not ours.

Here’s the beginning of the poem:

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate . . .
And the Master so gently said, “Wait.”

“Wait? you say wait?” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I’m claiming your Word.

“My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I’m needing a ‘yes’, a go-ahead sign,
Or even a ‘no’ to which I can resign.

If this resonates with you, be sure to click the link to read it in its entirety. I didn’t want to run afoul of copyrights by printing it all here. If you enjoy an audio/video format, someone has presented it that way on YouTube too: